Two Kinds of Fear

Boy sitting in fear of something

In times of stress and uncertainty, fear doesn’t need much of an invitation. A rumor about changes at work, an unexpected health concern or an unfamiliar situation quickly stirs up negative emotions. We react before we fully understand what’s happening inside us.

Here’s something important to consider…there’s fear and then there’s fear.

There’re actually two kinds of fear…real fear and imagined fear. Being aware and knowing the difference changes how we respond in any moment of time.

Real fear is natural and instinctive. It happens without thinking. When we’re respond and move to safety.

When my children were young, if they hurt themselves fear surfaced instantly and I reacted without hesitation. This type of fear is protective and keeps us safe. It’s immediate, appropriate and passes once the danger is gone.

Imagined fear, on the other hand, is learned. It’s not about physical danger and is related to the unrest we feel inside.

This fear shows up when we worry about what others might think, say or do. It’s the fear that stops us from speaking up, trying something new or being fully ourselves. We hesitate not because we’re unsafe, but because we’re afraid of judgment, rejection, or failure.

For example, we don’t raise our hand, share our idea or take a step forward because we think people will laugh at us. Nothing is actually happening yet our body responds as if it is.

The emotion of fear tends to surface for one of two reasons:

1.      It nudges us to move out of where we are — we feel afraid.

2.      It alerts us that something doesn’t feel right or won’t work — we feel nervous or unsettled.

The key difference lies in whether the fear is responding to a real, present danger or a story we’ve learned to believe.

When we begin healing and resolving the inner unrest connected to our imagined fears, those fears lose their grip. Over time, we find ourselves living with more ease, less worry and far less concern about how others might respond to our choices.

And in that space, we don’t just react to life…we begin to live it more freely.

Wherever you are on your journey, may you find your own truth…find what works for you… and you’ll always be guided to feel at peace inside.